During medical training, I learned that positive reinforcement came to the ones that worked the most and the ones that left the hospital last.
We often wear our extended hours, lack of work and life integration, and burnout as honor badges. We often feel like better doctors if we work until our brains hurt and often forget to blink for hours while staring at a computer screen.
When deadlines were approaching, my sleep was often sacrificed, followed by my workouts, calls with my grandmother, and any healthy eating ("pizza goes well with grant writing," I used to say). These behaviors led to exhaustion, health issues, and a lack of anything that resembled a life outside of work.
In October 2020, I was diagnosed with COVID-19; I was surprised because I had not traveled or visited any place besides my house and work. I had not seen my family for months, and the last time I was in a grocery store was in March 2020. The circumstances of how I got COVID-19 probably belong in a different blog. The day after my diagnosis, I worked for 8 hours on an important presentation and, despite having a high fever, I answered all emails.
